Our adoption story
My wife Jessica and I adopted Noah at birth, in January of 2014. We adopted his brother Zachary, also at birth, in September of 2015. Noah and Zachary are both brothers by adoption (as part of our family), and by birth (they have the same birthparents).
How has adoption impacted your family?
The first impact is the same impact that children have on all families. What was once a quiet, peaceful home with ourselves and our cat, is now a chaotic scene with toys everywhere, pacifiers and sippy-cups on the floor, not much sleep and a lot more laundry. Noah and Zach are both very energetic little boys, and definitely keep our lives interesting. Jessica and I couldn't be happier. Our cat hasn't quite adjusted, though.
The second impact is with the birth family. We have an open adoption with Noah and Zach, which means we know the birthparents, and have an ongoing relationship with them and some of the extended birth family. There was definitely anxiety going into this. Would we like them? Would they like us? Would we have anything in common other than the boys? We felt strongly, though, that this was the right way to go. It was important to us that Noah and Zach know where they came from, and equally important that the birth family be able to see the boys grow up. Happily, this relationship is going well. We share pictures with the birth family periodically, and we also hop on a plane once a year to go visit them.
Why did you choose to adopt?
Choosing adoption was a long journey for us, involving lots of infertility treatments, an eventual pregnancy, and medical complications that led to a stillbirth. These same complications left my wife unable to carry a child. This narrowed our choices for building a family quite a bit, and domestic infant adoption was the best choice for us.
After a mountain of paperwork and a couple more years of waiting, our sons' birthparents chose us to parent Noah. A few month later he was born, and our lives were forever changed. A couple of years later, she made the same choice with Zach, and a few months later he joined our family.
How did you hear about the adoption benefit?
We became aware of the adoption benefit through the yearly open enrollment roll-out prior to Noah's birth. We're grateful for this benefit -- a quick internet search can give one an idea of the costs involved in domestic infant adoption (legal fees, travel, birth mom expenses, etc.) The benefit helps to offset these costs.